We Won't Move Without You: Choosing Into Dependence

We Won't Move Without You Series

In May of 2013, Eric & I talked about all of the possibilities for our family – opportunities, changes, risks, adventures, best laid plans. We were only a family of 3 at the time, but had dreams and plans for adding what would soon become our sweet & sassy Hailey. As we talked, I became overwhelmed at the idea of change in the midst of planning for a second baby. We talked, we prayed, we talked some more, and the chorus from a song we sing at church came into my head: “We won’t move without You”. We agreed that our phrase for the foreseeable future would be “We won’t move without (God)” – that we wouldn’t make any changes or plans unless we felt God specifically and clearly calling us. This is the second post in a series of 3 posts about the ways we've felt God moving us over the last few months.

Previous posts in this series:

Get Out Of The Boat

We Won't Move Without You: Choosing Into Dependence

Right around the time Eric & I came to realization that it was time for him to look for a new job, before he was even able to update his resume, Eric was contacted by somebody about an opportunity. He set up a meeting, but was pretty certain it wasn’t for him. In fact, he likely would never have had the meeting had we not just recently come to the conviction that he needed to leave his job (It's funny how God's timing works like that). We figured it couldn’t hurt to check out the company and the position.

He came home after that meeting intrigued with what he had heard. The company was a Fortune 500 nonprofit financial organization, dedicated to helping people manage their money well and committed to generosity. Eric was working for a large retail bank at the time (and had been for nearly a decade). He helped people manage & invest their money, but was feeling a lack of purpose in it. One of his prayers for his career was to find something with more meaning. He felt hopeful at the prospect of this being something where he could provide for our family and really make a difference at the same time. We decided it was worth while for Eric to continue the interview process and we wouldn’t make a decision until we absolutely had to (actually, the truer story is that I kept trying to figure out what we were going to do about this possible opportunity and lost sleep until Eric gently reminded me that we didn’t actually have to make a decision about the job that night. Thank God he balances me out!)

After those first few meetings, we waited. We prayed. We talked to our community, our closest friends, our family. I let Eric know this was his decision and I would stand behind him with whatever he chose. This went on for weeks. Then one day in December, our best friends had their first baby. I went to the hospital to visit them and as we were catching up, they asked if Eric had made a decision yet. While telling them that he still hadn’t decided, I shared that I fully believe Eric could do this if he decided to. I shared how much I believe in him, how confident I was that he could do well at this.

In that conversation, it occurred to me that I had been so careful not to exert my influence on Eric’s decision that I hadn’t made clear to Eric just how much I believe in him. So I went home and I told him. I shared just how amazing I think he is, how gifted he is at developing good relationships, how much he truly cares about others, what a blessing he is to his current clients, and how I knew that if he set his mind to this, he would do great! I made it clear that I fully believe in him and respect him, and while this is his decision, I stand behind him 100% if he wants to take the leap.

If you (like me) don’t do this often enough, I would encourage you to speak these sweet word of truth & encouragement to your spouses regularly and freely. It is something I am learning to do more and more, and WOW! It can really make a difference. It was that moment that Eric knew I had his back. He knew that I was up for the adventure. He knew that he would never be in it alone. And with that, his mind was made up. 

We have faced a lot of adversity and suffering in the 8 years we have been married. Through it all, we have learned that our true security is only in God, not in ourselves, not in our friends, not in our marriage, not in our children, definitely not in our money. I don’t say that lightly. We had stood face to face with challenges in nearly every single one of those areas. This was the first time that we were choosing into the challenge, instead of the challenge happening to us. We knew this would stretch us, grow us, be difficult at times, and that we could ONLY do it through dependence on God, that we would need Him to strengthen us, make us strong, provide for us, and make us brave.

And He did.

And He still is.